Girls, Girls, Girls.

I got a little taste of Karma today...

I  sat on my on my phone and shattered the glass screen.  Yes folks, my ass has taken on such a life of its own the sheer size/weight of it has become capable of crushing iPhones. Sure, I am used to constantly splitting my pants, but that is only because clothing companies have yet to cater to girls with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face.

I suspect my bad mojo has something to do with a recent Facebook post I made about Lena Duhnam.  If you watch "Girls" then you know where this is headed.  If not, don't worry, you can still keep up.  

After watching the past few episodes, I simply stated how I too, need to write a television show (which I also star in) so I can make myself irresistible to numerous men even if I am 20 pounds over weight and not very attractive.  

Even though it sounds harsh, it was meant to be less of a personal attack on her size or physical appearance but rather more on her ego. Her weight is not what bothers me about the show.   It's not even her constant nudity. I probably weigh at least 15 pounds less than her, yet I personally wouldn't subject an audience of five to my naked body let alone millions of viewers, but hey, that's just me. If she feels that comfortable in her own skin, more power to her, although I think I sound better than Adele in the shower, but that doesn't mean I should put out an album.

I am probably going to break the next chair I sit in for that last line...

My real issue with her is more along the lines of...if you are going to write a show called "Girls" with the notion that your audience will relate to said girls, you needs to make the show realistic. No believes that a girl most people would consider average could score as much ass as she does...sometimes really hot, doctor ass at that.  I like to think that if I spend a good 3, maybe 4 hours getting ready, I am a solid 8, and there is no way I could pull Dr. McDreamy from a few episodes back (and I'm packing some serious cleavage in my corner too). 

If you have not seen the show, let me catch you up to speed with a couple of images from that specific episode so you will stop thinking I am a total asshole...

This is her character Hannah,

and this is the doctor who was supposedly smitten with her instantly.

See what I mean?
I am pretty sure even if you are a guy, you would still rather have sex with him.

Don't get me wrong, I do love the show and think Lena is a very talented writer, actress, and producer. She can make her character get naked every episode and promote positive self-esteem and healthy body images for all of woman kind. She can even make Hannah have tons of sex with a plethora of guys, but it's going to be more realistic if it's with the Kevin Smiths of the world. She really needs to realize we aren't buying it otherwise...

She started out as a writer just like me so on that note, if I ever get the chance to write/star in my own show, I am going to call it, "I fucking wish" and cast Ryan Gosling as my husband.